I am reading the book " Women Who Run With the Wolves" book written by Clarissa Pinkola Estes.
I highly recommend it to ALL women!
I came across this sentence
A woman may try to hide from the devastation 's of her life, but the bleeding , the loss of life's energy, will continue until she recognizes the predator for what it is and contains it.
Immediately, I was enlighten to a truth. I was that woman hiding the devastation of being abused from the world. I pretended to be happy for a very long time. My soul was bleeding inside. My aura energy was losing life.
I continued reading ( I only recommend you read 2 to 3 pages a day, allow yourself to reflect on what you've read as this is a very profound book) and this next sentence spoke to me.
I am about to share something with you that only my family members know and my oldest son remember as well. And it isn't until I have read this sentence that I realized my soul was warning me to get help!
During my 15 years of being in an abusive relationship. I remember countless of times I would wake up in the middle of the night yelling. I would sit up in my bed and just yell. I yelled so loud that I remember my oldest son came asking "Mom, are you okay" at which point I would awaken and say "Yes, I am okay baby." I don't recall what I was dreaming about. But I do know that during this time I was very stressed out, depressed, etc etc.
As I read the sentence above. I know it was my soul yelling wake up, get help, GET OUT!
I thank God for giving me the strength and courage to leave this relationship.
I am so grateful to have OVERCOME all those obstacles and be able to help others.
Devastation Revealed was the abused being manifested in my night mare cry for help.
Remember abuse of any type is wrong. Physical, Emotional, Verbal, & Mental abuse are all forms of Domestic Violence. I have a website dedicated to spread awareness. If you or someone you love is in an abusive relationship please share Overcoming Verbal Abuse with them.
As a survivor I know I felt alone. It was hard to talk about it to my friends. I could only trust my family and towards the end I kept it to myself.
Have you ever been in the presence of someone whom speaks negative about themselves?
I have and for that reason I have decided to write this post.
Over the last two years, I have learned what we think and speak creative our reality.
If you speak of lack, negativity, poor attitude that is what you will attract into your life. YOU are calling that into your reality.
I recently was near someone that was calling themselves a moron. That person said it more than once. I didn't correct this person but immediately I felt an drain in my own energy. We are energetic beings. I felt sorry for this person as well. Why would you call yourself a “STUPID Person”....so wrong in so many levels.
My friend. You must be careful what you speak because there is one special important person that is listening that person is YOU!
Over the last 2 years, I have removed myself from anyone that is negative or speaks negative. Besides learning that “I AM” is the two most important words that you can speak and what follows it.
So the next time you want to say something about yourself....say something like
I AM smart!
I AM beautiful!
I AM loved!
I AM healthy!
I AM worthy of all good things!
The words that follow are endless. So choose positive words! Words that LIFT you up NOT tear you down!
Have you ever had an "Answered Prayer"?
Today, was one of the happiness day of my life!
After 2 years, God answered my prayer.
It was a long painful wait but honesty won at the end.
The funny thing is that the battle never had to have taken place. See my battle was winning 50/50 shared parental custody of my twins. Something so simple yet something that was fought so that I would not have.......I waited 2 years to have my day in court. To face a judge and to pour my heart and soul that I loved my children, that I was always a good mother, that even though they do not want anything to do with me, it wasn't because I was a bad mother.
See my crime was leaving a relationship that was killing me inside.
I never imagined that someone that loves their children would turn around and put them against the other parent. That is called Parental Alienation. I didn't know this until I left and it started happening. I have forgiven everyone involved for their part in this matter. I have left it in God's hand just as I did the day I went to court and raise my right hand and swore to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me God. I went there with the TRUTH!
I am so THANKFUL to God that He answered my prayer. I was awarded 50/50 shared parental responsibilities. My joy is overwhelming because for someone that is a good mother and knows the reason why I left and all the manipulation and brainwashing for the treatment I am receiving now. It was my victory.
I know that my twins are older and I can't force them to come with me and spend time with me. But I want them to know that if at ANYTIME they want to be with me, they can come be with me and NO ONE can prevent them!!!!
I love all three of my children with all my heart. With the emptiness of these last 2 years, God brought a young woman into my life whom took me in as her "mother" and I see her as my daughter too. And I know why God did that...it wasn't for me to forget my kids or replace my kids because that would NEVER happen and there would be NO WAY I would replace her parents. But it was something that I needed in my life and she did too.
Today, I am happy! So happy! God Answered my Prayer after 2 years.
My prayers continues......because I pray that my twins will open their eyes and understand that I love them with all my heart! I will be waiting for them to come around!
Nancy Santana's passion is to empower, motivate, encourage, and inspire you to reach for your dreams and goals.